MÈRE Stories: Lindsay deOliveira
I didn’t have an easy pregnancy, so I was so ready to be done being pregnant.
Labor, surprisingly, was beautiful.
I had a golden hour with my daughter that I’ll always remember—but everything changed right after.
I was being wheeled from the delivery room to recovery, holding my one-hour-old daughter in my arms, and that’s when it hit me.
It was like a switch flipped.
I didn’t feel the way I thought I would.
The joy, the overwhelming love—I felt none of it.
Instead, terrifying thoughts crept in, and I felt totally detached.
I didn’t know it at the time, but postpartum depression had arrived.
The next two weeks were a blur of sleepless nights, barely eating, and whispering to myself: I can’t do this. I don’t want to do this.
I kept going because my daughter deserved it, even if I didn’t feel like I did.
At my two-week checkup, I told my OBGYN everything.
She put a plan in place right there—starting me on sertraline and connecting me to a therapist.
She saved my life.
Around the same time, we learned my daughter had reflux and was colicky, which only deepened the overwhelm.
But the tide started to turn. My husband, my OBGYN, my therapist, and our pediatrician became my lifeline.
Being open to the village around me—letting people help—is what pulled me through.
If you had to summarize your journey in motherhood with all its challenges, how would you describe it now? How have you found a way to reclaim your strength or identity? What have you learned?Motherhood, I’ve learned, is like anything new—you fumble, you doubt, you feel like you're messing it all up…and then slowly, you don’t.
You figure things out because you have to.
The confidence comes later, little by little, and with it, the fear softens.
I’ve changed completely in the process. This is hands-down the hardest thing I’ve ever done—but I genuinely like who I’ve become. I’m proud of this version of me.
I’ll never be the same woman I was before I became a mom…and honestly, I don’t want to be.
What advice or words of encouragement would you give another mom walking through a similar chapter? This new chapter of life comes with new rules—and none of them say the dishwasher has to be emptied right this second.
A few moments of peace, a nap, or just sitting down to breathe are more important right now.
Making memories with your baby will matter more than weeding the garden or checking off your to-do list.
So give yourself grace. Be present when you can, and gentle with yourself when you can’t. Because whether it’s a good day or a hard one…this time really does go by fast.
How has your journey changed you, both in ways you expected and in ways you never could have imagined?I never imagined that the simple things would become the big things.
A beautiful day outside. My daughter giggling at something silly my husband does.
That’s the magic of motherhood—it shows you how deeply joy can live in the smallest moments. I’ve learned to slow down, to really see those little things, and it’s made me so much happier.
You don’t have to chase the perfect picture. Just choose to see the joy that’s already in front of you.
— Lindsay deOliveira
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