“That contrast – two very different births, both meaningful – taught me that motherhood rarely looks like the plan we write in our heads. You can do everything "right" and things can still go a different way. And yet, it doesn't have to be perfect to be good.”

“I can struggle with anxiety AND be a calm mother. Pregnancy can be hard AND I can love having babies. I can thrive in the fourth trimester AND have postpartum anxiety. A lot more of life is lived in the gray than either the black or the white.”

“While it’s so vulnerable, I’ve had some requests about my birth story and, for me, positive birth stories were helpful to read and watch to help me know how to speak and dream and what is actually possible.”

“I didn't think getting unexpectedly diagnosed with ADHD and C-PTSD would be on my pregnancy bingo card, but it was. I had never once heard anyone talk about ADHD in adults—let alone women.”

“Secondary Infertility: It's haunting. It's purposeful. It was full of wisdom and learnings. And pain. Plus, it took energy away from my firstborn son.”

“My plans for a natural birth dissolved into a whirlwind C-section, followed by a rare case of postpartum preeclampsia that kept me in the hospital for nearly ten days. I expected an overwhelming rush of love and joy; instead, I felt disappointment, guilt, and a deep sense of failure.”

“Trust your gut and do what feels right—your mama intuition knows. It’s there for a reason. Whether it’s a parenting decision, a business move, or just how you spend your time, that inner knowing is powerful. The more you listen to it, the stronger it gets.”

“I was working 70-hour weeks, surrounded by the evidence of my biggest dream in the form of baby gifts and an empty crib, and completely unsure how both versions of me were supposed to coexist.”

“It was like a switch flipped. I didn’t feel the way I thought I would. The joy, the overwhelming love—I felt none of it. Instead, terrifying thoughts crept in, and I felt totally detached. I didn’t know it at the time, but postpartum depression had arrived.”

“The doctors diagnosed me with Raynaud’s Syndrome—offering nothing but a printout and a sympathetic shrug. I felt broken. Like I had already failed at something I was supposed to be made to do.“

“Even with tons of support—my mom stayed with us for 3 months, postpartum doulas, all the "right" resources—I still struggled with PPD and PPA. I felt so embarrassed and ashamed. How could someone who "did everything right" still end up here?”

“Looking back, I realize that a lot of my sense of self, belonging, and accomplishment was tied to my work and professional reputation.”

“Motherhood isn’t always soft lighting and sleepy baby snuggles. Sometimes it’s hospital gowns, heartbreak, & hip harnesses.“

When Expectations Don’t Meet Reality